Saturday, January 24, 2009

More than meets the eye

The human body is a fascinating piece of equipment, but little did I know it is also a transformer.  Although baby will still probably rather play with Optimus Prime than Pregnant Prime, with the popularity of realistic dolls these days (pooping dolls) it may be marketable.  So without further ado, the top ten things (in no particular order) I have learned about transforming preggers.
  1. They need new bras partly because the rib cage actually physically expands to fit everything in.  This includes...
  2. the uterus which starts about uhh small grows to 1000 times its original size :0
  3. Pregnancy pants have fake zipper 
  4. A sperm and egg makes more cells and magically some becomes a cute little baby, and some becomes the disgusting but necessary placenta.
  5. You actually have contractions all through being pregnant not just in labor.
  6. A sit up appears to be physically impossible.
  7. Women's blood circulation patterns permanently change to get more blood to the uterus.
  8. Pregnant women don't fit in bed as well, partly due to the massive number of specially positioned pillows to keep parts propped up.
  9. Pregnant women mucus production increases greatly.  This can lead to barfing.
  10. There is A LOT we don't know.

1 comment:

  1. I'm still waiting for my little Stevie heart beat ring tone.